Are you trapped in the "crazy cycle"?

Recently a friend recommended a book called Love and Respect. I haven't read it (there are fourteen copies at the library but they are all checked out - we'll have to see what hubby can do). However, just reading ABOUT it has been helpful. It's basic premise is that many marriages are caught in a "crazy cycle" where "without love - she reacts - without respect - he reacts - without love" etc. etc. - thus they cycle. If you go to the website read The Marriage Book and The Diet Book - it is RIGHT on - you will be shaking your head in agreement.

I got the chapter information off of the SAPL website basically this speaks to how we can show love and respect to each other. I think this is pretty public informaiton:

C-o-u-p-l-e : how to spell love to your wife -- Closeness ... she wants you to be close -- Openness--she wants you to open up to her -- Understanding--don't try to "fix her", just listen -- Peacemaking--she wants you to say, "I'm sorry" -- Loyalty--she needs to know you're committed -- Esteem--she wants you to honor and cherish her --

C-h-a-i-r-s : how to spell respect to your husband -- Conquest--appreciate his desire to work and achieve -- Hierarchy--appreciate his desire to protect and provide -- Authority--appreciate his desire to serve and to lead -- Insight--appreciate his desire to analyze and counsel -- Relationship--appreciate his desire for shoulder-to-shoulder friendship -- Sexuality--appreciate his desire for sexual intimacy -

So anyway, I hope to actually read the book soon so that I might better understand all these things. But more than that - I probably just need to pray and consider how I can better respect my husband. From other blogs I've seen that there are other acronyms to help you know what words are respectful and loving - but I haven't read so I can't say much about those. So I encourage you to think about how you are meeting your spouses needs! Later I'll talk about what I am learning about how boys learn best - lets just say often it involves moving around!
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Post Summer Goals Update

Where has the summer gone - heck it's almost October. I'm a little behind. First with the announcements - the fundraiser for Z-Place was very successful (although a little hot in the gym). It was a much better event than last years' - in large part because of the couple that coordinated it. Also, little man's birthday party was a smashing success. We had about 16 kids under age 5 running around our house and having a GREAT time. I hope all the parents enjoyed it too. It was just fun to catch up with everyone. So now little man is two and he is showing his colors!

So, I will update the goals that I wrote in May:

1. Work on reading classical literature for Great Books. - Didn't really happen. I can say that my hubbie has listened more to stuff about these works but I am no closer than I was before. I think I should probably pick a list and start reading!

2. Learn more about teaching reading - possibly through SWR. - I did not start following the SWR program. However, I did read a lot about reading this summer and have learned a few things:
- Many Montessori teacher's are just as confused as I was about how to help Montessori students learn all the spelling rules etc. These are not things that are easily "discovered". So I think I like Montessori oral prep work and hands on approach but at some point a kiddo needs some direct teaching.
- Core Knowledge is working on a pilot program using Diane McGuinnesses approach to reading. I spent a lot of the summer before little man was born reading her stuff. Their new curriculum sounds FABULOUS! I have read most of the lessons they have posted and it's great. They have a skills stream (direct phonemic instruction) and a listening strand that incorporates science, fairy tales and social studies to build vocabulary and following story structure, etc. This is a GREAT way for children to learn.
- Spell to Write and Read - I just can't see myself using this structured and complex of a program to teach a five year old to read. I think it is a GREAT spelling program and I very well might encourage the use of it for 2nd or 3rd graders to make sure the "get" it all and are spelling well.
In the end the point for us now is to help little guy hear the sounds in words and play with words and stories to help prep him for reading - when the time comes.

3. Being better at planning meals - well that didn't happen either!

4. Being outdoors - going to the park - I was very successful at this. To be honest, this is one of the few goals that I really felt God calling me to do. Everytime we get in the car little man wants to go to the park. We have been to a park somewhere at least 4 times a week. He has had fun playing with other kids, we even made some new friends! He is a parkaholic. We'll have to see what happens as it turns colder - but for now we continue to enjoy the park.

Many other things have changed this summer - but for now we'll leave it at that.