Thursday, October 23, 2008

Child Centered not child friendly

Much of education today talks about following the child's lead, allowing the child to be themselves and similar seemingly appropriate phrases. In fact it is hard to find an early child care center that doesn't claim this approach and often elementary schools follow suit. For a long time I think I agreed with these sentiments but recently things have changed for me. Right now I am going to Bible Study Fellowship and we are studying Moses. This week we were talking about Pharaoh and that basically God had given him over to himself. In Romans 1 Paul discusses that if you want to go your own way - God will allow you to do so - often to your own destruction.

God is clear about his ways and he expects you to "train up" a child in the way they should go - they won't figure it out on their own. He also disciplines those he loves - because he wants them to have life and have it abundantly. I agree that sometimes "training" can turn into brainwashing and truly out of whack ideas, just like letting a child follow their own ways can.

I really think that Christian parenting is about finding that middle road between allowing the child to do whatever they think is right in their own eyes (which God normally doesn't think is a good idea - that's a judgement phrase in the Bible) and becoming so legalistic that your child never understands the grace of God either. It's not an easy balance to have. It is especially difficult when two polar opposites seem the only choice and both of them are pretty adamant that they are "the only way". I guess I encourage you to really consider what it means to train up a child in the way THEY should go (not necessarily exactly how you think they should be). I know that's my prayer for my little guy - that God would give me wisdom about how to train him to be the person God has created him to be and fulfill the plans God has for him.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Been saying those prayers for over 30 years now. Parents never stop praying for their kiddos and grandkiddos ...

Anonymous said...

A comment on the pumpkin pictures- it just doesn't seem right to go to the pumpkin patch in sunshine and short sleeves! My class went last Monday in the rain. It has to be cool and rainy for the full pumpkin patch experience at least in the PNW. Enjoy! My students had a good time estimating wt. and how big around their pumpkins were and then weighing and measuring them. We also sorted and drew them then I cut mine open and we talked about the seeds. The next day we ate the roasted seeds, after many "eewws" and I don't like them. All but 1 or 2 students had thirds on the pumpkin seeds. Now I have to bake my pumpkin, puree it and make cookies and pancakes with it. So many thing you can do with pumpkins. The other morning kinder teache painted a large pumpkin with the blackbaord paint so the kids could draw on it like a chalkboard. Fun!