Yeah Cloth Diapers

Well today a little miracle happened at our house. My 15 month old left our family room and crawled (because he still refuses to walk) to his room. This was fairly strange behavior because he was playing just fine. When he got to his room he went straight to his changing pad (which is on the floor), sat on it and looked at me. He was wet and wanted to be changed!!! He wasn't even poopy. So we'll see what this means and if he does it again. I tried to praise him profusely.

He continues to try and "clean" things around the house. He has also started feeding himself with a spoon pretty well. He can do it well with his left hand. His right hand is another matter. He sort of tries to catapult it into his mouth. Sometimes it works for him depending on how "sticky" the food is.

He has also started getting on to his little tricycle more. He is very cute as he rides it around. He gets off of it by inching himself off the back end. It works.

So this has sort of been a string of posts about what little man is doing. I guess that is the main thing going on in my life. Everything else is a Christmas surprise for people. Congrats to our friends who have recently given birth or announced that they are pregnant. I think I know about 7 people expecting between May and July of next year. So much life - it's very fun.

My son - the cleaner

Well I have been enjoying time on the Internet while my son slowly explores all the "safe" areas of the kitchen. He's been at it for about 45 minutes now. It is messy but he is having a good time. My favorite part is when he takes the dishrags and wipes things down. He's been doing this often recently and it is just TOO cute. He isn't really cleaning - but he's trying. Actually Montessori does have a way to teach cleaning so I guess I should pull out that information and teach him how to do it - he would love it.

He still refuses to walk. He is still a little unsteady but he really could probably do it if he tried. He "accidentally" takes a few steps every once in while between chairs or other close objects. He is also getting better at signing. Although I think he thinks the sign for "more" means "food". I get the point. He certainly knows the signs for bath and milk - two of life's greatest pleasures in his estimation. It is almost bed time so we will need to wrap up this playing session. He sure has had a good time though!

Wrappin' it up!

Well this week marked the end of our trial period for our co-op. The review meeting went really well and we are all looking forward to beginning again in the spring. I have a few things to learn before then because we will start teaching more langauge and math concepts. I also finished my grad school course. My final project ended up being much bigger than it needed to be (over 30 pages plus a website)- but I was having a good time. You can see the webpage if you'd like. It was fun and I am glad that it's done.

There is a chance that little man may be a climber. After figuring out how to get up onto the dining room chairs he has realized that the same principles can be used to climb on top of the table and the piano keys. He is not allowed to do these things - but he tries.

He might be paying more attention to the signs then I give him credit for. Yesterday he went into the bathroom in the middle of the afternoon and made the sign for bath. We didn't take one at that point. Later that night he heard my husband and I talking about it - came by on his way to the bathroom and made the sign. He also LOVES making the sign for milk (now he drinks lactaid or soy milk).

So now its on to new projects - I have a couple I have set aside that I will pick back up now.

Every day something new!

I can't believe how quickly the little guy is getting new things. Little man is now working on feeding himself with a spoon - although he isn't always that successful. He also managed to climb in and out of our kitchen chairs yesterday. All of our friends were entertained because he was on his tippy, tippy, tippy toes to do it - he was determined that's for sure. He has taken a few steps by himself (mostly to get between larger pieces of furniture. We have a baby gate surrounding our computer area and recently he's taken to trying to lift the gate up so that he can come around the outside edge - he is pretty strong.

Today he was playing with the curtain in my room and I asked him if he wanted to go outside. He immediately started crawling super fast straight to the door that we use to go outside. He then stood up and tried to push the lock open for the door. As soon as I opened the door he walked out of it on two feet. I guess he REALLY wanted to go outside. He had a good time and I discovered we still have pecans out there. I had to convince him that sticks are not good for eating.

We'll see what he does next!

Thankful for . . .

I hope that you and yours had a great Thanksgiving. This year I think Thanksgiving snuck up on us - but we had a great time. My parents were in town and we went out to visit my Aunt and Uncle. Good food, laughs and rest. Can't ask for much more.

This week little man has learned quite a few things and I am very thankful that he continues to develop and grow into a little boy. Here are the things he has learned:

1. How to push a chair over to the counter so that he can better reach on top.
2. How to hold onto an adults fingers and walk around (he still doesn't have enough balance to walk on his own).
3. How to go to the fridge/ his high chair to tell us that he's ready to eat.
4. How to climb onto our couch by himself.
5. How to loosely put some of the lids back on his toys.
6. He crawls to his room for a diaper change and to the bathroom if you talk about getting a bath.
7. Sometimes he can put puzzle pieces (big ones with knobs) back into their correct hole.
8. He uses words like done, more and sometimes spoon correctly. He really isn't interested in signing with us - he just wants to say the word. (Although more means food I think - whoops).

We are very blessed and have many things to be thankful for this season. Now on to decorating our house for Christmas!

Reflection

Today as I read about the role of reflection in teacher education it highlighted a difference between my understanding of wisdom and knowledge and the education systems take on this subject. I have to say I am not as adept as my husband in sniffing out the philosophical implications of a belief system - but today this little bit of information hit even me over the head.
The article discusses different theories on reflection and depth of reflection. As it summarizes them it says "Third, the higher a persons’ reflective thinking develops the more he/she starts to realize the subjectivity of knowledge, the relativity of truth, the multiplicity of sources of knowledge and the importance of context in determining meaning." (Baker El Dib, 2006, bolding mine) Basically, the point is that the more reflective thinker is open to the swaying wind of ideas and the mulitple frameworks of the world. I think that many people do see this as the hallmark of an educated person. However, I have to disagree. I think that while a well educated person knows about these different things, in the end they are grounded in something, somewhere. As the old saying goes "Don't be so open minded that your brains fall out!"
Often the goal of the educational establishment is not to anchor students in truth or provide them with a good foundation of knowledge but instead to introduce them to all of life's possiblities. Often these days people talk about critical thinking, higher order thinking, etc. Which I am in favor of to a large extent. However, in the end you must have something TO THINK ABOUT and a STANDARD to compare things to (or else how can you be critical). The relfective practice above does not create a standard - it invites you to create your own in some ways. In fact, you might be thought less intelligent if you CHOSE to hold onto a traditional standard. So once again the prevailing view of an educated mind seems to fly in the face of true education. I never thought I'd be a "back to basics" kind of gal - but I think it is growing on me.

Concentration

Today my research was discussing the unrealistic expectations that pre-service teachers sometimes set for children. The example they used was expecting 1st and 2nd graders to be engaged in work for a long while. Common knowledge is that they flit from thing to thing and have short attention spans. This caught my attention because Montessori expects the exact opposite of its students. In fact, elementary classrooms have 3 hour work periods in the morning where students choose their work and go to it. She believed that students could be taught to concentrate deeply if given the right atmosphere and properly engaging objects. She basically talked about Flow before the term became a buzzword.

Tonight before bed we finally let little man do his own thing (after running lots of errands today). He is only 14 months old but he already has the idea of flow. He spent about 20 minutes just playing with two of his shape puzzle pieces - he wasn't even trying to put them in the puzzle. He was banging them on things - putting them up high and down low and generally just checking them out. He took a short break and then went back to it for about another 10 minutes. I am not sure if this is normal or not. I will say that at least once a day he will get lost in his play for about 30 to 45 minutes. He will pull out all his books or empty his kitchen cabinet and just see how everything works. If a 14 month old can do it - I expect with encouragement and the right atmosphere older kids can do it.

This again points out the difference between the education I think my child will most enjoy and benefit from and the choppy, line up, sit down, read aloud education that has to be given through the public school. There really isn't any other way for a public school to function - but I'm not sure that's the best way for my son to learn.

It's been interesting to watch the coop class I am leading. I think the kids are so used to trying to "get through" everything and just recently they started realizing that they can sit and enjoy working with one item. One of the kids that we all sort of expected might struggle with this has really taken to it. He spent a good 15 minutes with the pink tower - building, unbuilding, comparing sizes, etc. He spent another 15 minutes pouring beans. I think he liked the noise and the feel - but that's the point. This kind of work engenders a love for learning because it allows students to explore for themselves - not constantly being told what to think about whatever they are working with. This is a HUGE change for me - but I like it.

I have to say I have been lost in a few projects recently and that's why I haven't posted. The research is interesting - I love to research! Another time I'll talk more about what I'm learning.

Bumper Crop

Pecans for sale! Seriously, it is a little out of control here. Recently it has been beautiful outside so little man and I have enjoyed our backyard. Sometimes while he is playing I work on ridding our backyard of pecans. There are so many! Today Paul Harvey reported that there is a bumper crop of pecans this year - well my backyard proves it. While I gathered pecans today my friendly neighbor called over the fence to offer us some pecans. NO THANKS! We only have one tree - they have two. You literally can't walk without stepping on a pecan. My neighbor did offer an encouraging word - she says that they only come every other year - so no wonder we didn't have this issue last year. None of our friends want pecans because they all attended another friend's pecan picking party. It's sort of like an easter egg hunt in the fall. Anyway, all this to say - do you have any good pecan recipes?

. . . and then he popped a tooth

This week has been a little crazy at our house. About a week and a half ago pretty much our whole coop group was exposed to a yucky stomach bug. Little man got it and couldn't keep anything down (for about 5 days). Then my hubby got it. Somehow I avoided it (so far). Hubby (and everyone else's) only lasted for about a day or so. But little man's kept dragging on. So, we ended up at the doctor's and he sent us to the outpatient pedi care at a local hospital to pump him full of fluids. Fortunately he fell asleep for about an hour of the two hour treatment. He is feeling much better but he is now dealing with diarrhea (which happens every morning right around 6 am!) He is still not too interested in drinking ANYTHING - which is frustrating. Yesterday as I was hanging out with the boy I noticed an extra white spot in his mouth. Apparently in the midst of all of this one tooth busted through and another seems to be working on it. So now he is up to almost six teeth. It has been quite a week.

Here's a little ditty . . .

As I was playing around today on other people's blogs I found a link to songs from the 19th century. If you scroll down it has the whole list of songs and when you click on it the sheet music and words appear (it's sort of like a hymnal for children). Reading the text is amazing because the words are all 5 and ten cent words. The meaning behind them are great too - although it does seem like they are from a different century in SO many ways. If you are looking for "new" old songs to expand your repretoire this is a great little site - especially if you can pluck out a tune on the piano.

A little early but . . .

So this year little man might be able to participate in some Christmas activities. I am glad that we now attend a somewhat liturgical church because that means they might observe Advent. I think that Advent is a great way to help prepare your heart and life for the real meaning of Christmas. I really hope to make this a special time with lots of good memories for our family. I am still collecting ideas but here are a few that I have found so far:

The Jesse Tree - This is a neat idea because it really tells the whole story of the Bible and God's love for us in the course of the 25 days leading up to Christmas. Although the graphics aren't great on this site they give you the right idea. This site gives you an overview of the days, symbols and scripture readings.

Advent Ideas - this is truly "no frills" but it has some really good ideas about helping families prepare their hearts for Christmas - worth the read despite it's plain presentation.

Sticker Advent calendar - I saw one of these on amazon - but you could make your own from clip art and the self made lick and stick - I honestly don't know how long the adhesive would last but it would be fun. So you could do a bunch of Christian symbols, symbols of the season etc.

Old Christmas Cards - It's probably a good idea to save them for future projects - don't know exactly what to do with them - but they could be used again.

One blog I read last season talked about having a family activity for every day of advent. Some of them were simple like smile at your friends today. Some were memory making like baking Christmas cookies. Other were spritual - read part of the Bible. Anyway, they were all mixed up and each day the kids would pick the activity out and do it. (With older kids they suggest you brainstorm together the ideas at the beginning of December- or maybe during the long weekend of Thanksgiving). There are lots of ways you could expand on this.

Some of these sites are a little more Catholic than what I would pursue - but they have great ideas. So, if the stores can start setting up for Christmas, we can start preparing our families hearts to engage with the real meaning of the season. We'll see what my family actually ends up doing this year!

Makin' a list, checkin' it twice

If you need help choosing fun and educational toys for Christmas this year (or birthdays) I will pass this little gem on to you. Many of the items are for kids 4 and older so I will have to wait to buy these goodies - but they all look so fun. There are a few preschool items on there. Have fun browsing!

Coop Week 2

Well despite some of the kiddos getting sick - overall week 2 was a great success. I amazed at how well the students are doing - picking their own work, really working at it and having fun. Yesterday I introduced a basting activity where kids transfer colored water from one dish to another with a baster. One of the little guys really loved it - he kept showing his mom what he was doing and he was all smiles. Another student kept telling me how "cool" everything was. It is really hard for them to just watch me demonstrate - they really want to get involved and do it all. Which is the point.

So, I think I have sort of figured out the language stuff for now. I am also reading through Reading Reflex again. It is a similar approach to Montessori - without the sandpaper letters and with cards instead of a "moveable alphabet". Reading reflex basically teaches that letters represent the sounds we make with our speech. Both methods focus on the sounds that the letter makes- not the name of the letters. This makes so much sense - but somehow the A, B, C song seems so popular it's hard to overcome. So children get confused - the letter c - see; however, its sound is cuh. So when we ask them to spell or read they have to go through the process of naming and then sounding - if we just teach the sounds - they just sound it and don't worry about the names.

I have not tried Explode the Code - which also seems to be very popular. Has anyone tried it? I have looked at Teach your child to read in 100 lessons - but it was too visually confusing for me. I do admit that I didn't try very hard.

So, I think it will take all of Christmas break for me to figure out how to teach the math section - but that's okay.

Is the library overwhelming?

Today Reading Rockets pointed me to another great resource Just One More Book. It seems to be similar to Trelease's read aloud handbook - but since it is basically a blog and podcasts it keeps up with current literature. One of my cousins gave me Trelease's book as a baby gift - it was a GREAT idea! She even put notes about what her family liked - a very nice and helpful personal touch.

Anyway, I haven't explored everything on the site - but it looks like you can search by author or by subject area. It is an act of passion and love by the people who collect all this information. So, if you are looking for new books this might be the place to start. This is the type of thing I might do if I wasn't doing so many other things. I'm glad someone out there is doing it for the rest of us.

Look what I can do

I mentioned that my mom was here last week. As she left she mentioned that little man would be able to do so much more when she came back (in just two weeks!). She was right. Here are some new things he is trying out:

1. Standing on his own - it was for split seconds but now it is a little longer
2. Sitting on his little potty - sometimes he will stay there, sometimes he won't
3. Trying to put tops onto his "dishes"
4. Rolling and throwing balls
5. Reaching and trying to open door knobs - he doesn't have enough leverage - yet
6. Turning on and off the lights - repeatedly

I am most excited (and freaked out) about the standing on his own. I think this means he will be walking soon and it is ALL down hill from there. I think once he can stand well our table tops will never be the same.

From 0 to 60

I can't believe it's been so long since I've blogged. My mom came into town last week and I took it easy for a while - so that's the zero. Now that the coop has started, my classes are still going and I have board meetings next week to prep for - so that's the 60. On Tuesday we had the parent meeting for the coop and it went really well. It is a more diverse group than I thought- which is GREAT. Many of the kids are right around the same age which is helpful.
Today was the first day of "school". Some kiddos got new backpacks, some took pictures for the day - I was surprised. They are all excited about school though. Overall the older students did very well. They seemed to enjoy the activities and catch onto some of the basic routines. I am realizing that our older kids are more advanced than I expected them to be - so I am playing catch up with that.
Two moms agreed to take care of the younger students. I think overall they had a good time except for the fact that little man spent most of the time crying because mommy wasn't paying attention to him. This is all part of the process I guess. The younger kids (18 months and under) are going to focus on baby signs, singing songs and some physical development activities (fun things to help baby stretch etc.). I am so thankful for these moms that are stepping up.
I hope to update weekly on how our coop is going.

Sleeping update

When we returned to the doctor for little man's shots we discovered that he had a mild ear infection - so that could be the cause of all his crankiness in the middle of the night. It seemed like something more than usual. Yet again - somehow I picked the one week that he's sick since he's born to try and do something new. I have moved his yogurt meal to the evening and I am now just doing what the Baby Whisperer calls a "dream feed" around 10:30 pm or so. I still am not sure if it is working - he slept until 5:30 yesterday and was up for the morning. This morning he did his "normal" wake up around 3:45 or so - but he did go back to sleep. Who knew this would get so complicated?

My whole life does not revolve around sleep (okay, well, it almost does). We are getting things ready for the co-op. That's actually my goal for the next few days (and has been for the past few days) to figure out what lessons and materials we will start with and go from there. There are soooo many! We plan to start in less than 2 weeks.

Warning - do not try this at home

Recently I got in my head that little man is a year old and I should probably wean him. I had read about this once upon a time - but not recently. He was already down to about two feeds a day anyway. Of course, last week, when he was sick, I fed him four times a day. In my brilliance I decided that right after he started feeling better I should go cold turkey! What a fool! Feeding him four times a day for two days of course increased my milk supply and then I was in pain and huge. I decided I should probably read up on this again so I pulled out my copy of "So That's What They're For". I glanced over the section and found key phrases like "don't go cold turkey", "consider why you are stopping" and "breast infection". So, I decided to reassess my strategy.

So now I am going to move to one feeding a day. Lots of people talk about their children having a favorite feeding. Well, little man doesn't care about the day feedings and the two days we went cold turkey he didn't miss the bedtime feeding. The only one he seems to care about is the 3:30 - 4:30 am feeding that I started before summer camp this summer. We tried to break this habit on Saturday morning - 2 and 1/2 hours he was up and MAD. Finally, we fed him - with a sippy and milk - and he went back to sleep. So, I guess this is my next issue - how can we get him away from getting up so early in the morning? The Baby Whisperer talks about accidental parenting and I think I have fallen into a bad pattern here.

Success!

Yesterday was the big fundraiser. Although I have had my doubts that this would be a success since March - I have to say, somehow - not by me - it all came together. We ended up with 30 silent auction items (as of Wednesday I knew we had about 12)! We served about 75 plates or so (as of yesterday we had 36 confirmed attending). So once again God was bigger and brought it all together. I actually took little man with me to help set up for a while in the afternoon and he stayed in his stroller for about 2 and 1/2 hours just watching us (and eating pasta some of the time). He barely fussed at all - although he was looking pretty tired at some points. His chill attitude is SO helpful to mom.
So now we are on to the next adventure - the preschool coop. It actually is scheduled to start in about 2 weeks so I need to GET BUSY! I think we will have about 8 kids to start with which is a pretty good number. We'll see what happens from there. I was able to purchase some curriculum materials this week. From the little I've read they are wonderful and exactly what we need. However, I was busy gluing fish nametags together so I didn't have much time to browse through them. That's my goal this week. One of the albums has over 40 lessons on "grace and courtesy". Who can't appreciate that?

Murphy's Law

Well I think someone gave little man a very nice birthday gift - a little virus. So he has had a high temperature for the past few days. No other real signs of sickness - a little lethargic but other than that he seems okay. This of course is his first real illness - which messed up our well baby appointment today (it became a sick baby and we'll have to go back for the shots). The other issue is that tomorrow I am helping to host a fundraiser. Well I had planned to draw on the generosity of my friends to watch little man while I took care of business - but I can't do that when he's sick. So, here we are. His first real illness comes in the midst of a key time. Dad also isn't available because they are down two or three people at work. So, that's the way it goes. I do hope he gets better quickly for his own sake. With some tylenol in him he barely acts sick at all (although his temp is still around 101).
Such is life with a small child - never on your schedule are they?

A special thank you

Well today is little man's first birthday. He decided to get up early but that gave me some time to fix muffins before dad left for work. The muffins that had chocolate chips in them and he wasn't quite what to think of them at first.

We were taking the slow approach to opening presents and we opened the last of the ones that we have this morning before daddy left for work. I would like to extend a special thank you to regular reader RMH who has graced our home with noise . . . um music. Just kidding - he loves banging on the drum and the other musical instruments that came with the set. I am sure that this will entertain him for quite a while and it's not that loud.

I'd also like to thank my parents for the puzzles. My hubbie and I were on-line about to order a bunch of puzzles on Saturday- then the sale ended and it wasn't quite as good a deal. The ones you got are two of the one's we had chosen. Actually just before we opened the presents my husband was hoping aloud for puzzles.

I was hoping we'd get to go out some today - but it's been raining pretty hard all day today. If I remember correctly it also rained last year on his birthday. So I guess we'll just stay inside and play with our new toys! :)

Another Quick resource

I have been looking through Charlotte Mason and other lists of "books you should read" to your little ones. On this list was a series of books that had fairytales from around the world. Well as I researched it further I found a website that has all of the fairytales on it! So, if you are looking for fairytales or stories from other cultures this is a great resource. I think I already posted a site that had many of Aesops' fables on it.

My women's group has started reading Safe People by Cloud and Townsend (our favorite writers). Today we talked about character discernment. One of the reasons people often recommend reading fairy tales and the fables are because they help kids learn more about good and evil if the adults with them can break it down to a level they can understand. Obviously the traits are a little overstated in these stories - but they can help children begin to grasp the concepts. Of course, you really can't beat the Bible for great stories of messed up relationships!

In case you wanted to know . . .

I am continually amazed at the range of articles that the Reading Rockets people put together regularly. They are truly excellent at condensing articles about preparing kids to read and encouraging them to read. This week they have a review of some of the most popular reading programs used in preschools and elementary school. I am happy to report that Reading Recovery (a very popular program) overall got great marks. So if you are thinking about homeschooling, concerned about the approach your preschool or elementary school is taking - this might be worth reading. They also reviewed early childhood programs in six domains related to reading and math. These are just a few of the areas it appears they review curriculum. I can't comment on their educational bent or politics - but it seems that they take their assessments from studies that meet certain requirements.
Additionally, Reading Rockets links to a website that provides a checklist for parents as they consider their child's preschool options. Overall this checklist looks good - although a Montessori school might not meet some of the standards because of their different approach to teaching. But if you are looking at a Montessori school I hope that you realize the reasons for the differences between this school and the typical preschool. These are pretty stringent guidelines - but you do want the best for your child!

Christmas in September!

Last week my friend and I decided to take the plunge and buy a whole boat load of Montessori materials for the co-op. Today the materials arrived in three huge boxes - all of her children were very excited about the boxes. After they were all in bed we began to open and open and open the boxes. I didn't realize just how much stuff we would have. It is all well made (it seems) and I know what to do with most of the materials - so that's good. Now we just have to figure out how to hide . . . ummm. . . store everything for the kids.

Co-op plans are coming along. We decided to do a "trial run" this fall for about 6 or 7 weeks to work on the kinks and to allow people to go through the holidays without extra stress. After this time we will evaluate how it's going and see what we might want to change. Our target first day is October 2nd - so it is coming up pretty soon.

I am now trying to decide if I should participate in an on-line very loose Montessori "training course" starting in October. I think it would probably be worth it. I am also taking the gifted and talented program development course this fall from UNT. I am not sure what to do for my major project because I don't work at a school - I think that will be next week's challenge (oh
plus the fundraiser I am pulling together).

Receiving all of that cool stuff was like Christmas in Spetember. I am really excited about actually using it. I think our kid will love it!

New things little man has learned . . .

• how to take off a velcro diaper.
• how to open the door to mom and dad's room by pulling on the door stopper.
• how to remove a door stopper (and the plastic cover).
• how to turn the pages of a book.
• how to open cabinet doors.
• how to sign light.
• sometimes a trash can will fight back - it tipped over on him.
  
• flags are fun to wave.
  
• how to play the piano (he doesn't pound it because he lacks the leverage)

These are just a few of his recent discoveries and abilites. They really do surprise you just about every day at this age.

I knew it was coming

Last week I commented on moves towards making preschool more academic. I believe that in general 3 year olds do not need these "academic standards" to help them learn what they need to know at this age. Today I received proof positive that my fears might come true in New York city. Apparently, the chancellor is promoting academic preschool for three year olds. AHHHHHH! Don't they know what is good for our littlest ones?

What to do??

I am a little lost. This is the first weekend that I have had "free" since the middle of May. I busied myself getting ready for little man's Curious George themed birthday party/ Labor day bash. We have decided to have breakfast for dinner - a pancake buffet! So this week I will be making more pancakes than any one person should.

Additionally, I have been giving myself a crash course in the Montessori method. I had a few good books about it and went to the library to find a few more. I think I am putting most of the pieces together now. I can see why it might take two and a half years of course work to master all this information. I have also read through some yahoo user group messages and friendly blogs that have given some good guidance.

I started cleaning my house. This will take a few days - because I am slow (unmotivated in general) and because I am WAY behind. As a part of this I have started organizing the mounds of paper everywhere - little man enjoyed playing with all the papers that were going to the trash. I have put together all the paperwork for summer camp and I am about half way through writing that report - YEAH!

Tomorrow my new class starts - now that I have only one and a full semester I don't think it will seem as overwhelming. So, not to worry, I am finding things to do. My husband still wants me to read Harry Potter - so far I am holding out.

My first phrase

Today little man said his first phrase. Let me preface this by saying once this past week I think he said bye-bye in context. Yesterday as we were doing our nightly reading and prayers I could have sworn he said "Amen" after I did last night. Well this morning was unmistakeable. We were eating breakfast and saying good-bye to Dad. Dad got out the door and then A picked up his hand, waved and said "ba-ba da-da"! Well I freaked out and ran to the door and told dad to come in and give his genius son a kiss. A was a little overwhelmed by the attention. When Dad left again A did it again - not as clear - but he was doing it!

He has also been trying to use signs but it's a little confusing. To most people his favorite sign looks like milk. But, we haven't taught him the sign for milk so it could be many different things: waving (hello/bye-bye), light (which I think he also did on purpose this morning) or come here (because we are always waving at him to follow us places around the house). You have to watch him in context to see if he's just flapping his hand or trying to say something. I should probably start being more dilligent about the signing again now that I'm home more often.

If it's not one thing . . .

Last night I decided that the toddler size prefolds I am using are so awesome that I should try them at night. I did put in an extra "insert" of terry just to make sure it absorbed enough. When I went to get A (after he slept through the night - YEAH!) he was dry as could be. I was very excited. The prefold kept everything in and the diaper cover (bummis super whisper wrap) worked great!

I was quite surprised when I turned on the lights later in the morning to discover a wet spot on his sheets. The only thing I can figure is that it was a big pool of drool. Little man is teething (although they haven't popped through yet). So, if it's not one thing - it's another. My husband did call me today to let me know that I had a very dirty cloth diaper waiting for me at home. I think he was a little frustrated with it. But with the toilet attachment it was cleaned up in no time flat. The only problem was little man trying to "help" me out.

What your preschooler should know . . .

Stay at home moms sometimes are concerned that their children, who haven't attended preschool, may not be ready for "school". I found an interesting list of things your child should be able to do in preparation for preschool. These types of lists are never exhaustive and have to include things that are somewhat measureable. But it is interesting.

Actually the whole concept of the site is interesting because they are basically campaigning AGAINST universal preschool. "Who would be against schooling?" you may think to yourself. Well, I have to say that I probably would be a member of this camp. It is a difficult issue but in the end I don't think that all three, four and five year olds should spend full days (or even half days) in school everyday. Of course, some families need care like this and hopefully their providers incorporate age appropriate materials. I guess that's the other issue. Often, when the school district gets a hold of preschool it twists it into some type of academic exercise that is not in keeping with the needs of young children (even first and second grades often don't use appropriate methods because they are getting ready for tests in third grade). Anyway, I see the need, I know the research and at the end of the day I think many, but not all, can benefit from preschool. I am glad that it is becoming a more widespread option - but it should not be mandatory by any means.

In some ways, this leads to our co-op idea. Basically, few of us have the funds or got on the waiting list early enough to send our children to preschool. However, we are intelligent people with a range of abilities and interests (cooking, music, other languages, etc.). So, we are looking at pooling our resources to create a "co-op preschool" for our kiddos. It would probably only meet two days a week in the morning and we are still debating about the type of curriculum we would use (montessori, enrichment, Bible based, etc.) I will post more about this little adventure as it develops.

Whirlwind Tour

We just returned from a 700+ mile trip with stops to see friends and family. Our primary goal was to attend a wedding (which we made it to just in the nick of time). During our three day trip we attended three church services in three different cities, met a new baby, met a new boyfriend, saw the grandparents and great grandparents and drove all over DFW. (I slept - my husband drove.) A was a trooper (although the first night was sort of rough). He did make it through all of the services without too much complaint and spent a lot of time in the car contemplating deep thoughts. We were trying to encourage this as my husband selected Famous Romans and a biography of Isaac Newton to be our books on tape. Newton was quite an interesting character. The lecturer for the Romans tape was a great storyteller and I actually enjoyed military history. My husband wonders how I could have been a history major and never had an interest in the military - oh well.

So now it's sort of back to normal life. I did register for a fall class on running gifted and talented programs today. I am prepping for A's first birthday and a fundraiser event. Additionally, my friends and I are considering starting a co-op preschool. So we'll see how all of this fits together. I also intend to start cloth diapering again - which I am looking forward to in a sort of strange way. So, back to being somewhat domestic. We'll see what happens next.

Lessons learned

This is the last week of summer camp - an 11 week ordeal. I have learned MANY lessons about myself in the midst of this craziness. If you know me you might think - duh - as I share these lessons, but help me remember them in the future.

1. I love to start things; I'm not so great at finishing. I started multiple projects with the kids with great intentions, high hopes and somewhat of a plan. However, I wasn't always as good with the follow through. This surprised me because I've always thought of myself as a fairly disciplined person. In some ways I "lose interest" or something new comes along. Now that I am a mother I need to be more prepared to follow through and finish what I start.

2. I am not a good rule follower and therefore NEVER want to run a licensed child care center. In high school if you asked me what I wanted to be I would almost always answer a preschool/kindergarten teacher. Actually, I wanted to run my own center. I have even taken quite a few courses to support this interest. Today's events drove home the point that I would be a TERRIBLE center director because I really can't follow the rules. I am saddened because this issue caused other people trouble today - which was not my intent.

3. In order for my singing to be "appreciated" the audience must be under 7. At least once this summer I had to stop in the middle of a song because literally I was hurting my own ears. The kids thanked me (partly I was losing my voice too). So, I was not really intended to sing anything beyond fun camp songs. The younger the audience the better - they are less discerning about those things.

4. I like working with "smart" kids. I realized that most of the jobs that I have had have been with kids that would be considered gifted and talented. I don't intend to be elitist but I realize that I enjoy working with kids who are budding nerds. Who really enjoy learning and are hungry for it. I am not so good at coaxing kids into learning. So, it is my goal to complete the 4 courses in gifted and talented education and see where that leads me.

5. I have a LOT to learn about management. I am too trusting of people, expect them to have good motives at all times and to care as much as I do. Well, they don't. I also do not like to break the tough news, make the hard decision or do other things that are "management" activities. So, I can plan things very well, but carrying them through is much more stressful because I am not good at directing other people therefore I do it all myself. Again, I have often thought of myself as a leader - but maybe I am not as much of one as I had hoped.

This summer reaffirmed my decision not to be a classroom teacher. It taught me that I do not have what it takes to run a child care or full time preschool program. It has bolstered my opinion that I am cut out to do something that doesn't really exist out there - run great enrichment programs. What that means I don't know - but I intend to continue praying (and trying not to scheme too much) to learn more about this.

Is summer over??

Well all, it has been a LOOOOOOOONG time. I took on way too much this summer - two grad courses about gifted and talented education and running a summer camp (technically open 6:30 - 6:00 every weekday). I have almost survived it - summer camp ends this week and I think I ended up getting A's in both of my classes. I also learned a fair amount from the classes too - which is more important when you are basically taking classes for enrichment purposes. Maybe at some point I'll distill some of what I have learned over the summer. NEVER AGAIN would be the main message - but there are more.

If nothing else this summer has been good because my husband and A have been able to spend mornings together. They have bonded a lot. A is now crawling really fast and trying to reach up and grab everything. He is super tall for his age so basically every table is fair game as far as he is concerned. This is a problem because mommy and daddy are pack rats - and not very neat ones at that. Ah well.

A turns 11 months tomorrow. So, we are getting ready for his big birthday party. I didn't expect to do the whole birthday bash - but now I am getting excited about it. So, it will probably be more of a party than I originally intended. Most of my activities are aimed at my friends children who are 2+. A will be happy playing with his cabinet of old cool whip containers and will probably not care very much about the party except that lots of his friends will be here. We just love to have parties - so it will be fun.

I'll share more about the craziness as I decompress. I only got 4 hours of sleep last night so I need to hit the sack now.

Too much celebration

We are a blessed family. We have been able to stay in contact with many friends and celebrate life's milestones together. Today we were invited to a housewarming, a graduation brunch, a graduation ceremony, a baby shower, a one year old birthday party and a wedding. We made it to the graduation brunch and the wedding. I love that we get to celebrate real life with people -but often I find myself analyzing life instead of enjoying my friends. So, I am trying to step back from that role and just enjoy the good things God has given us.

The graduation brunch was for the students that I was "mom" to at the boarding program. They all make me proud - I was almost in tears as I left. They are really good kids and they are off to great things. I hope that they all realize just how incredible they are to move to another country, learn a new language, live in dorms and somehow make it through high school.

The wedding was also awesome. I thought our wedding season had passed (some of you may remember we went to 7 weddings in 8 weeks one fall - well we will attend 3 in 6 weeks this sprping.) It was outdoors with a BBQ following - very Texas. I love weddings that are an expression of the couple this one had their name all over it. For the first time ever I saw the couple share private vows (in addition to the ones we normally take in marriage). It was really cool - you couldn't hear what they were saying (it's private) but you could see their love for each other. The other cool thing was that the pastor went through 1 Corinthians 13- the love chapter- talking about how we as their friends and family could show love by being patient, kind, forgetting wrongs, etc. He had us consider what we were saying when we commit to support the couple. It was very cool.

So today we celebrated. I am very sorry that I missed the housewarming, birthday party and baby shower - just not enough time. Please know that I am celebrating with all of you!

It's been a while

Well I think I have succumb to a little bit of temporary insanity. I will be helping to run a summer camp program for a non profit affiliated with my church. I am looking forward to it but it will be lots of work! It already has me pretty busy. I do have to sing the praises of the city because it will allow my husband to be home in the mornings so I can work and then we will switch. It might be a little tough because my hubbie and I won't spend a lot of time together - but it's a short term thing.

In another news my little one has figured out how to push himself up to sit on his own. Today he did this right near our radio and he attempted to push the buttons - so we'll be moving stuff around again soon. He is getting closer to crawling but he's not there yet. So I'll continue to keep you updated about the excitement of summer camp.

Emotional Melt Downs

Well many of my friends have children that are turning growing up and trying to handle overwhelming emotions.

Recently I read Happiest Toddler on the Block which discusses dealing with children from about 12 months or so until they are about 4. He encourages parents to repeat what your upset toddler is telling you - with words and actions. He recommends using short phrases, repetition, emphasis and gesturing. Empathizing with your little one helps him realize that you hear him and allows him to calm down enough to hear what you have to say. (Obviously in dangerous situations you do NOT use this method). If you've ever been to a counselor or learned anything about counseling they constantly talk about repeating what you are hearing from the person you are talking to - Karp is applying this to little ones. The thing that strikes me about Karp's method is that he emphasizes body language and encourages parents to furrow their brows, beat the door, or do other more dramatic things to help express emotion. This makes sense because your 18 month old can't understand all the words you are using - but your body language can communicate a lot. He does admit that a lot of parents feel like fools acting this way - but when it works it's hard to argue with the approach. That's just part of the book - it's very interesting.

The other book or program that I've been looking at for preschool aged kiddos is the I Can Problem Solve approach. This method has been taught in classrooms and homes with long lasting effects for kids. Basically it teaches a series of phrases to help kids express their thoughts and think through situations. It seems really simple - but I think that's what makes it effective. I actually got Myrna Shure's book at the library and I think it's something that you can incorporate into your everyday life. When my little one is older I think I will be trying to incorporate this approach into our family life.

So these are just two options that might be worth checking out from your local library.

Reading - step by step

In my search for information about teaching phonics I found the NAEYCs statement outlining the literacy goals from preschool to third grade. I think this is a balanced look at what children should be able to do at each stage. I think I could very easily fall into pushing my kiddo to do more than he can or should do at a certain stage. These markers help me remember it's not a race and that learning to read is a process that takes time and trial and error.

On the other hand, this informaiton is useful if you feel that the school is pushing the academic side of reading too much. NAEYC is the most widely recognized accredidation organization for early childhood centers. If the school is drilling and killing too much you might encourage them to consider this statement and how it should impact the way they teach their students.

As far as phonics goes, it appears that there is no standard way to introduce the letters and sounds. There are suggestions that basically start with the easy sounds and work from there. The research does indicate that a systematic approach to teaching phonics is key to becoming a proficient reader. So, if for some reason the school your first grader attends is still insistent on the whole language approach as the only method - you need to step in on your child's behalf. You can teach phonics at home if need be.

In the end, remember that the goal of reading is inform, entertain, communicate, etc. - not decode. So, we need to make sure that we are reading materials to our kids (yes even when they are older) so that they can learn to enjoy the whole process of reading and see a reason for wading through the difficulty of putting together all those sounds.

Great Literacy Info

For all you moms out there (or grandmas) who are wondering how to make the most of your time at home and help your little one to enjoy reading I found a great site. It's probably a little more academic than most sites (it is out of the University of Florida) but it has great information on it. It looks like they have really done their research and condensed it down into a usable format. My two favorite pages are:

1) Inexpensive Literacy Materials and Activities - that says it all and they are easy to do too!
2) Characteristics of Children's Writing - this handout tells you about the developmental stages that children pass through in their writing. It's pretty nifty.

Another interesting piece that I found in my search is about transitioning into kindergarten. I realize it is May, but I want to post it before I lose it. This site has lots of information for parents about the BIG step. I think my favorite page is the 80 items that can help ease your little one (not so little anymore) into kindergarten. It's not a screen or skills test - but it gives you an idea of the types of things they should be able to do. So those are my educational finds for today.

My little copy cat

I think my son is trying to sign to me. bThe sign I have been most consistent with is "all done" (where you flip your hands over a few times). He has been practicing this movement - but it isn't at the "right" time. For example, this morning at 5:30 am when he wanted out of bed he started trying very hard to flip his hands and communicate with me. Last night at 11ish when I changed his diaper for the night he looked like he was trying to do the sign for light. I was VERY tempted to turn on the light for him - but that would not help him sleep. It's pretty exciting to see him start figuring things out.

On another note, I am reading the Baby Read Aloud book. It covers a lot of things I already know (because I read about this stuff incessantly). I am still struck by the difference in the number of words kids from different backgrounds are exposed to. It really is a great advantage to have a mom who is a blabbermouth and has a somewhat sophisticated vocabulary. I like the Jim Trelease quote in the book

"If the child has never heard the word, the child will never say the word; and if you have not heard it nor said it, it's pretty tough to read it and to write it."

Another little ditty from the read aloud guru (my parents had his books when we were little):

If your child is old enough to talk to, she is old enough to be read to. It's the same langauge.

I am preaching to the choir here. It really makes we want to support organizations like First Book. This organization helps put books in the hands of children who normally wouldn't have any books. You can easily support them by making and sending a card for Dr. Seuss's birthday so that Random House will donate books to children. You have to do this BEFORE MAY 1st though!

Today's Firsts

Drinking from a cup - Today we tried our sippy (again) and a regular cup that's sized for my little one. He did much better with the cup his size. I even gave him a little apple juice for the first time. I think he liked the taste of it - but he's not really swallowing very much - mostly he spit it out. He did manage to blow a few bubbles in his glass.

To the Alamo - We also went with a few of our friends to the Alamo today. Actually, to the grounds of the Alamo - we didn't go inside. It was a gorgeous day (83 degrees) after a really horrible rain storm last night (possibly 10 - 12 inches in some areas!). This week we are in the midst of Fiesta - the week when San Antonio throws itself a party. Today there was an art show of sorts down at the Alamo. It was a great day to be outside and enjoy the weather.

Laid down in the tub - Today he did this on his own. He normally is supported by my arm - but he sort of got himself down there before I could get to him and he seemed fine. In fact, when I tried to sit him upright to play - he protested. My only concern is water in his ears - any thoughts? Obviously we don't put very much water in tub since he's so young.

So these are the little firsts (or at least next steps) for the little guy. I do think he is coming close to crawling soon. Then everything changes!

Parenting Pages

Today I have spent an inordinant amount of time surfing the web. At about 11:45 I found something that is worth sharing. The first is a website about parenting written by a DAD! I have just started looking at what is on the site - but it seems really interesting with product reviews, book reviews, etc. (I found it because he was reviewing hairbows - it's a long story). So, you might want to check it out.

The other page is a link from Thingamababy. It is a book about reading aloud to your young child. I have recently been researching all types of information about reading - but I haven't come across this website yet. They have lots of good tips and I imagine the book is even better. It is hard to know what to do with books and your very young child sometimes. It seems that this book helps fill that gap.

So these are just a few little interesting tidbits I found. Enjoy!

The super whizzer

This week I have twice found my little one covered in pee pellets in the morning. I am not sure what else to call them - basically his disposable diaper has exploded and let out little styrofoam like peanuts that have similar properties to cornstarch and water. They are at once liquid and solid. VERY ODD!

I am not sure what causes these explosions. It could be that he simply is a super whizzer and his diaper can't contain it all. This diaper is supposed to be appropriate for someone much heavier than he is though. The other culprit could be a common male tendency, crotch scratching. At his young age he has instinctivly started doing this. So it's possible that he is putting pressure on his diaper that is helping it to explode. I'm not really sure how that would work - but I will put it forward as a theory.

He sleeps well through the night and I would prefer not to wake him up to change his diaper. Any thoughts?

Another symptom of the curse . . .

Although this symptom isn't mentioned in the Heaths' book, I think it crops up in my life. Those who have "the curse" in a particular area can't imagine why someone wouldn't be eager to read and learn more about their particular passion. However, it was recently brought to my attention (again) that most of the world does not have an insatiable need (or time) to learn and read. Therefore, as I write, I must remind myself that writing should be easily accessible to those who *gasp* don't enjoy reading. Most readers are not interested in the liberal arts, general enrichment approach to reading; they are interested in "What's in it for them". A good writer keeps the audience in mind; however, I am a selfish writer and write in a style that suits me - the minority. So to temper "the curse" I need to look beyond my abnormal obsession with knowledge and try to act like a normal person. This may be harder than it sounds.

In other news . . .

I guess I don't take "the curse" that seriously because I have applied to graduate school - AGAIN. I intend to complete my coursework this time. In the past pesky things like marriage, new jobs and pregnancy have gotten in the way of my studies. Actually, the biggest issue is that I did not take a stats course as an undergrad which makes it hard to puruse graduate studies. Lesson learned the hard way. This program is on-line and it is a series of four courses about working with gifted children. After reading Genius Denied and realizing that I use or lose my Americorps*VISTA money this summer I decided it was worth learning a little something. So my first two courses are essentially free - my VISTA grant covers them. It should be interesting and I imagine some of what I learn will be showing up here. So I will be a student - once again!

The Curse of Knowledge

As promised I am continuing to share a few highlights from Made to Stick by the Heath brothers. The Curse of Knowledge is something that I suffer from desperately. It truly does make it difficult for me to communicate with others (you might also call it pride, but anyway). Basically this curse works against you in a few ways when you are trying to communicate with other people. First, having too much knowledge about a subject can make it difficult to get to the core issue. You see all the nuances and it ALL seems important. Knowing too much about a subject can make it difficult to boil it all down - so you overwhlem people. Again you tell them three things instead of one and they actually remember NONE of it. Another issue is that you have trouble communicating the basics because you assume more knowledge than other people have. So you think you are sharing the basics - but even these "basics" are over your listeners head. You assume to much about what other people know. Good communication requires you to go back to square one to be effective.

In fact, sometimes people (no one I know of course) prefer to stay in thier brainy world instead of interacting with the real world. The example in the book talks about engineers and frontline workers. The frontline workers would identify a problem and ask the engineers to come down to floor, look at it, and fix it. However, the engineers preferred to consult their drawings and correct the paper version - not the real version of the problem. This sort of smacked me in the face - because I do this all the time - try to correct the theory instead of dealing with the problem in the real world. It's the curse, I tell ya.

They recommend using the question "why" to break through the curse of knowledge. This might be why we find toddlers so exasperating. They are constantly breaking down the things we thought we knew with their questioning. They are beating away at our comfortable knowledge in their effort to learn more about the practical, visible world around them. Some of their questions seem downright silly - but mostly because they aren't practical in the way we think of practical knowledge.

So, to be good communicator you have to overcome this curse and get back to basics.

A strange dream

Last night I dreamed that I was giving writing advice, based on the book Made to Stick, to a friend of mine that I haven't seen in about 2 years and who had a baby about 4 weeks ago! Strange.

So, I figured I should share a few more comments about the book. The basic premise is SUCCESs in sending your message:
S - Simple (Core)
U - Unexpected
C - Concrete
C - Credible
E - Emotional
S - Story

My dream was actually about point 1 - talking about the core issue. I often have so many thoughts that it is hard to choose just one. They all seem important to me. We have also seen this difficulty with our intern pastors at church. In the ELCA during seminary a year of your studies are as an "intern" pastor in a local congregation. This is a great concept. Our pastors learn so much and enjoy their time amongst us. However, they only give sermons about once a month. So often they try to cram all that they have learned in that one sermon. It often leads to too many points to remember and feels very overwhelming (and long). My husband has been on the intern committee that oversees these young pastors and they always have to talk about focusing the sermon. It's just hard when there are so many ideas floating around.

This is also made more difficult because the more "expert" you are on a subject the more details seem relevant. This is what they call the "Curse of Knowledge" but we'll talk more about that next time. For your idea to stick -you need to pick just one - not many. As my mom always reminded me as I'd leave for essay tests - "KISS - Keep It Simple Stupid!" I'm still working on it mom.

Softy Love

I will get back to blogging about Made to Stick but I have been ignoring the 15 library books I have checked out and trying something different this week. I have been online looking for patterns for various things and have found a few that I thought were worth trying out. So here are some of my creations from this week.

This is my rendition of the Chibi Bunny since it is Easter.

The big bunny is Buster for the boy and the little one is Mimi (she was my second trial run - the first one didn't even get stuffed). It is kind of hard to tell in this picture (the lighting isn't that great) but his left ear has already been mauled (I mean loved on). I also tried to make a cloth doll - but I am not sure how to make its head look human.

Yesterday I spent most of the day trying to get library books out of the little ones mouth so I decided he needed some cloth books. I found some great instructions that I played around with a little bit (but I can't find them now of course). Anyway, I decided to pull out my stamping stuff and make an object per "page". Overall they turned out well and he has really liked them so far. I am using non-toxic substances and I will need to heat set them soon. So now he has his On the Go book (cars, planes, etc.) and his Nature Book (bugs, leaves, flowers). He can chew on these all he wants.

I still am interested in making the baby booties - I have tried but I haven't found a pattern that works for me. Tonight I might have come across one (my problem is the heel). I am also eyeing the "sock puppy" much like the "sock monkey" (I made one of these in December and he turned out pretty good). Actually you can make "sock dolls" too and that might be what we end up doing for baby dolls around here. Seeing as my attempt at a doll so far looks like an alien.

There is a whole universe of softy animals out there. As my husband says, we don't really need any more stuffed animals - but it's fun. I am also thinking about going back to plastic canvas (a blast from the past). We'll see!

Creativity can be taught!

Commercial creativity can be boiled down to 6 templates that can be applied to sell any message. Actually there are two models that are used most frequently with success. I know this rubs against our normal understanding of creativity - inspiration. "Patterned creativity" sounds like an oxymoron - but it seems to be true. Apparently, using these models helps you to think more productively and they have proven effectiveness in helping your message "stick" with other people.

I won't get into the nitty gritty details of how they discovered this information or what the templates are (you can read the article above). The general idea is that they viewed successful commercials and discovered underlying patterns in the "best" commercials. Commercials that did not use these patterns tended to be less creative (and less memorable) even though they were tyring to "think outside the box" and be creative. To "test" this theory they taught these templates and people using them were able to develop more "creative" commercials. Obviously this does not encompass all of creativity - they aren't trying to do that. It does show that there might be patterns in places that we don't expect though.

This is just one little gem of an idea in the book Made to Stick by Chip and Dan Heath. I think this might be my new favorite book. Basically, it has systematically explained to me why I am not a good communicator and helpfully showed me how I can improve. I intend to share more nuggets from this book -but as it says - if you have three ideas no one remembers any of them.

New Skills

Citizen Schools peeked my interest in the book their work is based on, Teaching the New Basic Skills by Richard J. Muranane and Frank Levy. Although written ten years ago, I think their insights are even more relevant today. They argue that a high school diploma should be enough to prepare you for the average middle class job in America. However, they have found that the skills that schools teach and the needs of corporate America are not aligning to help our graduating seniors find decent jobs.

They have identified three major types of skills that, if well done in the classroom, should prepare the average student to find employment. They are:

• basic hihg school level reading and mathematics
• soft skills like team work, problem solving and presentation
• and finally basic computer skills.

These seem like things that would be learned in high school, but unfortunately that's not always the case. As my husband, who works at the library laments, many recently graduated students lack basic typing and wordprocessing skills.

In addition to considering what our students need to learn, they share a five points of effective management in corporate America.

1. Ensure that everyone understands the problem. Sometimes you truly are working on two different issues but think they are the same.
2. Design jobs so that there are incentives and opportunities for people to contribute. I think we've all be in a situation where they have asked for our input but not really wanted it - this needs to be avoided.
3. Provide people with the training needed to pursue solutions. This might be learning specific skills, patterns of thinking, etc. The other point they make here is to FOLLOW UP on training - we've all been trainings where there is no follow through. It's a waste of everyone's time.
4. Measure progress on a regular basis. How are we doing, how do we know that we are reaching our goals, etc.
5. Perservere and learn from mistakes. I like this point because it emphasizes that if you are trying something new there will be problems, issues and kinks. This attitude allows you to see them as chances to learn not failures.

This book does not discuss "knowledge management" as a term - but that is basically what they are getting at. But that's another tangent. So this is a quick thumbnail of the book and it is a good read because they use great examples of these principles in action. They have done their research and boiled it down to a few critical elements that business and education should heed. I can see what Citizen Schools has adopted their format to build their programs.

Raising Children Boring?

Recently I was browsing the Family Life Today website and came across a link to this interesting article "Sorry but my children bore me to death!". It is an article written by a mom who doesn't enjoy the realities of parenting. She tells her children that she loves them but really doesn't want to spend too much time with them. I do agree with her caution that some people go overboard putting their children at the very center of their lives. However, the choice to have children requires a sacrifice - either of the parents or the child. It sounds like she is choosing to sacrifice raising her own children so that she does not have to give up her education and career plans.

A lot of people attack her because she seems selfish (which is true). However, I feel sorry for her because it seems that she cannot find joy in the little things. One of the things I am looking forward to most is the "new eyes" that kids can give you on life. They are so excited about the little things - as adults sometimes we forget the wonder of new flowers, little bugs and similar discoveries. This is obviously not higher order thinking - but it is good to remember to be awed and amazed at our world sometimes.

She is also missing the long term impact that parenting will have on your child. You are helping to shape a life - for better or worse. This is an activity that demands a lot of thought, care and discipline. It is difficult because the rewards (or sorrows) aren't reaped for years. So, it is hard to know if reading this book for the zillionth time or singing a silly nursery rhyme will make a difference - but the little things add up in the long run. If you aren't there to do them then you are missing out on the moments that will encourage, shape, discipline and grow your child. Either someone else will do it or the opportunity is lost forever.

So, although the little things that are new to them may not be too interesting, the actual process of helping to influence and shape a human being does call on all our emotional, physical and mental resources. This is hard work and frankly a lot of people aren't really up the challenge.

I have to agree with one comment that I read about her piece. It mentioned that this was a thought provoking article but she hopes that the author's kids never read it! I second that. For all of her talk about loving her children, love is at some point laying down your life for others. Not to the exclusion of your needs entirely (this is the danger of the child-centric mom) but at least to the extent that the child knows you have an interest in and respect their abilities.

Parenting is hard work and all work is boring at times. Just be careful about sending the message to your kids that they are boring, unimportant, not worth your time. I fear that's what she might be doing inadvertantly with her children. Children will cope because they are resilient - but at what expense?

Garden IS Growing

I am pleased to share that I have not yet killed the plants in my garden (in part because it has been raining all week). I even have some little sprouts coming up. On the right is a little pumpkin sprout. On the left, if you look carefully, you can see that this little pumpkin sprout hasn't shed it's seed yet. How fun is that!
In another happy surprise we have lots of nice things growing around our yard (beyond the dandelions - which my husband did hack down last weekend - he was surprised at how mighty they were). I found some ivy, some herbs, and other plants that I can't identify (mostly because I know nothing about plants). We have actually owned our house for a YEAR now. Hard to believe - but we didn't move in until June last year so we didn't see all of this spring growth. Below is the lovely flower that greets us as we step out our front doorstep. I had nothing to do with it's growth or development.

Feminists Offended by Abstinence

This is a long post - but this stuff really gets to me . . .

Today Yahoo had an article about a secular abstinence group at Harvard University. I was shocked to read that some feminists were upset by the line "You're worth waiting for" because it's a "relic" that values purity! To read an intelligent conversation about the value of modesty and purity to the WOMAN I encourage you to read A Return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit (I haven't read the whole thing but everyone who has says it's great). Let's just say one of her main arguments involves free milk.

The mindset discussed in this article has been around for at least a decade. My husband had a friend, who, as a freshman at a California college, attended a seminar similar to the one mentioned in the article. I think the story goes that at one point the presenter shared about safe sex methods available to these verile, freshman boys. At the end of the conversation my husbands' friend asked why the presenter didn't share about the sure-fire safe sex measure - abstienence. The presenter was a little taken aback at the suggestion that this would be an option.

Things like this really get me riled up. For health reasons alone (now that Texas is all but requiring young girls to have the HPV vaccine) one should think twice before having sex. Let me digress for a moment to discuss the HPV vaccine issue. This is the disease that can lead to cervical cancer that is VERY prevalent in young people. However, it is a sexually transmitted disease - that is the ONLY way to get it. I understand wanting to stop an epidemic problem (or is it endemic) - but legislators telling my 11 year old that we know they'll probably have sex so they need this shot - that's a little much for me. Having the parental option - of course; requiring it at such a young age - I don't think so.

Okay, back to the "wise" feminists at Harvard. In the midst of all the conversation about rights over your own body, the biology of sex, etc., one thing is rarely mentioned - the heart. This is the part that gets me - women are told to be callous and free. Sex was created as an expression of intimacy and it can't be divorced from that without ripping at your emotions, relationships and your soul. I think that we need to recognize ALL the implications of premarital sex and prepare our young girls with the full picture - sex isn't just biology - it's also psychology - especially for them. This is not because we are the "weaker" sex it is because (as science continues to show us in all other arenas) body, spirit and mind are entertwined on so many levels. So you can have "safe sex" biologically, but it's almost impossible to do this emotionally.

The other thing that irritates me is that in two generations science and society have colluded to overturn long held propriety and morality. So that now, if you choose to be pure you are a "relic". Putting aside the moral and religious implications, if you choose to be free of disease, if you choose to ensure your children have a two parents (as much as you can anyway), if you choose not to do damage to your own body or emotions - somehow you are a non-thinking being blindly following tradition and outdated paternal social patterns. College students are adults (except when their mommy's show up to try to bail them out because they broke multiple dorm regulations), so they can make choices about their own body and how they'll use it - I agree with that. But today, it is almost countercultural to choose ancient wisdom over recently found "truths" that encourage you to do things just because you can.
Colleges are supposed to be places of academic discussion, varied opinions and open minds. So, my final issue is that according to the article 29%, admittedly a minority of college students, choose to abstain. If this were ANY OTHER (liberal) ISSUE everyone would be supporting the right of the minority to speak and share their views. But because it does not coincide with a liberal thought pattern (which according to the article seems to support the free speech of a student run porn magazine) - it must be belittled and touted as backwards, fuddy duddy and unintelligent. Props to the student paper columnist who didn't fall into this common trap.

So I just want to say that I support this "relic" behavior that a minority choose to follow.

Finding a good Bible story

My husband and I are a little leery of lots of toddler and children's Bibles. In part because they often fail to tell the whole story. They tend to leave out sin and other key things that happen in the Bible. They often tell the story of Noah but don't really explain why God felt it necessary to flood the whole earth. So I have been on the lookout for books that tell the whole story. Right now I am reading The Rhyme Bible Storybook. We are now reading through it for the 3rd or 4th time. I like it because it does rhyme which is fun and it gets at the point of the story pretty well. It doesn't really talk about sin or anything like that - but he's also only 6 months old.

Eventually we will move into other Bible storybooks and I have a few candidates. One was brought to my attention by a cousin. Actually it's series of books and tape recordings called A Visit with Mrs. G. The website leaves a lot to be desired but the materials are quality (according to my cousin - who is a reliable source). She says that the stories are very close to what is found in the Bible - always a plus.

The other resource I found at a friend's house. It is the Alice in Bibleland series. I had my doubts because it sounds pretty cheesy. However, I flipped through their copy of Jonah. I was pleasantly suprised to see that it did not end when Jonah decides to go to Ninevah (like most stories) instead it finishes the story and talks about Jonah basically pouting because God was saving people. Very few people ever hear the end of the story and this children's book was telling the whole thing. So, although it may sound hokey I think this series has something going for it too.

The other comment I'll make is that it might be worthwhile to try and buy books through ebay. A collection of "Alice in Bibleland" is a lot cheaper on ebay than at your local store. So there are a few of my thoughts about that. Although if you check out Amazon it seems like they are trying to sell these books for a cent + shipping ($3.49) - so I'm not sure what that's all about.

Montessori and Religion

Montessori was a devout Catholic (she was from Italy at the turn of the last century after all). Although her teachings are not directly grounded in faith, I recently found an interesting article about her views on developing faith in a child. There are quite a few points that I liked and that helped me think more about our own son's faith development.

She argues that from ages 0 - 5 it is crucial that parents and others demonstrate God's love by providing for the child and helping them feel secure (much like Erikson's first stage of development - trust vs. mistrust - although he places that stage in the first year of life). This grounds the child in God's love for them. I like that a lot. She warns against making church seem like school, lessons to be learned, etc. Although as a Catholic she emphasizes the mystery of faith, I would say that this approach also emphasizes the fact that God is relational - he wants to be in relationship with his people. We need to build a foundaiton that teaches children that God loves them through the people he has put in their lives (this is also a key element of the book How People Grow by Cloud and Townsend - a great overview of the book is about 3/4 of the way down this page).

The next stage, ages 6 - 12, is what other theorists call concrete operational (Piaget) or Industry vs. Inferiority (Erikson). Basically, children are beginning to figure out what they are able to do on their own but they are still very literal. This is the time where you often hear kids trying to figure out right and wrong, fair and unfair, etc. Montessori believes that this the best time to start teaching about the moral part of faith. Kids this age have a natural interest in what is good and bad and this is the time to introduce them to what God's word says about that. She argues that doing it at a younger age is teaching them something that they really can't understand. They will follow your rules because they like to please and follow others, but it is not until they are about 6 or so that they can begin to understand more about right and wrong - and sin. I guess that's one reason in faith circles they talk about this being the age of accountability. When kids are old enough to start making choices about their faith and what they will believe.

The final point that she makes, that I like, is about the changes we have seen in celebrating Christmas. Christmas used to be a 12 day celebration and each day you would get a small gift or at least you would wait until the 12th day (when the Magi came on January 6th) to open your presents. This approach allows Christmas to be about Jesus and his birth and the presents to be spread out (many parents talk about their kids being OVERWHELMED by presents) and connected with Christ's birth in a slightly different way. My husband claims that he's told me about this before and I think he has. But I like the idea of celebrating Christmas this way because it helps to focus on the important parts and spreads out the craziness. So, we might give this a try this year. Did I write about the neat Advent ideas I've found? Anyway, that's another discussion.

So there are some thoughts on faith formation in the Montessori way. Now, there is a whole movement called Godly Play (out of the Episcopal church) that teaches the stories of the Bible thorugh Montessori like materials. But that's another story too.

Not so little anymore

It is hard to believe but we are already starting to put items away that our little one has outgrown. Right now I am running his carseat and bouncer cover through the wash before we store them away for the next baby. After learning that he is 29 1/2 inches at the doctor on Monday we decided that he should move out of his infant seat which is for babies up to 29 inches. He likes his new seat and on one of the first rides christened it by spitting up all over it. He doesn't fight being in this car seat as much as he did in the other car seat.

Since about Monday he has also done very well sitting up on his own for long periods of time (1o minutes plus) which means that he really doesn't need the bouncer anymore. He hasn't really been in it for the past month anyway.

They say that they grow up so fast and they really do. One of his friends who is only two weeks older is already crawling and trying to pull up on things. Our little guy seems to think rolling will suit him just fine for the time being. He does try to push up a little to crawl - but he ends up going backwards or rolling over in the process.

Last week when Grandma was here she said that she had never seen a baby so young so interested in his toys. He really does like to play with them. He will chew, twist and turn them for up to 10 or 15 minutes without interruption sometimes. I've heard that concentration is a good thing - let's hope so.

He is still enjoying eating with a spoon. He was quite taken aback when I used water instead of pumped milk to make his rice cereal. He looked at me strangely and kept making faces while he ate it. Today we tried the millet according to the Super Baby Food book. Well, I didn't quite prepare it correctly so it was rejected. I have figured out the error of my ways and hopefully he'll take it tomorrow. So there's a little update on our little one.

Charlotte Mason Education

One of the families I used to hang out with used the Charlotte Mason approach to homeschooling. It is loosely structured, built on great books and generally seems like a good approach. It is sort of unschooling but not with an in your face, we don't like authority bent to it. Anyway, I found her 6 set series of books at half price books one day and got it for a steal of a deal. I have now found that you can read the original or a summary of almost the whole thing on line. Actually, I was surprised that her work wasn't included in the book I just read about alternatives parents have for educating their children. He had some other curriculum philosohpies that I hadn't heard of but not this approach.

As I consider the possiblity of homeschooling or at least how I want to create an environment for my little one to learn in, her thoughts are helpful. She has 20 basic principles that her work is based on. I do like the idea of narrating because I think it does help children internalize what they are learning when they can retell it. She also focuses on training of the will of a child - which is a key concept and something that really isn't going to be trained in a school setting. So, this is yet another idea among many about educating your child.

Cross Texas Adventure

I am a planner. Even for "vacation" we always had a plan and schedule to maintain (even loosely). However, my husbands family doesn't really plan and this past week his mom was on vacation visiting us. I am not used to driving long distances, trying lots of new things or really having "free time". In part because many of my previous jobs were so overwhelming that even most holidays I didn't really get off - much less other days during the year. So, I am still adjusting to the concept of "free time". Because my husband had a few days off we ended up traveling quite a ways. In fact, in the 14 months we've owned our vehicle we have driven it about 8,000 miles - in the past week we added another 1,000 miles!!!

It was fun to be spontaneous and try new things (except when the little one did not really like the hotel room). Actually, my mother in law normally has a plan - she just doesn't really tell everyone exactly what it is - so for us it is an adventure. We went to a great steakhouse in the middle of nowhere - Lowake - Texas. We saw the graves of my husbands' ancestors and the house where he used to visit his family when he was little. We checked out a lake that I haven't been to before and ate at TONS of different restaurants. My son was actually pretty patient with all of this change (of course yesterday he also took a 3 1/2 hour nap - I think he was WORN out!)

So I am realizing that sometimes it's okay to go on an adventure, not quite know the plan and just enjoy the journey. So maybe we will go on more car trips in the future - we'll see.

How does your garden grow?

Hopefully like the dandelions! Our backyard came equipped with a very nice little raised bed for vegetables. I figured we should take advantage of this. So, while my mother in law is visiting (she actually has a green thumb) I decided we should start a vegetable garden of our own. Yesterday we bought all the stuff (herbs, squash, peas, pumpkins, tomatoes, peppers and even some grapes!). Then we started preparing the soil. It turns out that our little vegetable garden had lots of weeds but also very good soil. We also upset quite a few rolly pollys. Today we will plant our plants.

As regards the dandelions, my husband says that he is going to attack them on Monday. They are very lush (especially after our recent rain). So, we'll see. This little garden is an experiment because I normally have a brown thumb. I figure this is worth a try though and hopefully next year my little one can at least dig in the dirt with me a little bit.

Goal Setting with kids

In Keys to Your Child's Heart I like the way Gary Smalley discusses setting goals with your kids. He emphasizes teaching children about goals and allowing kids to set their own goals. He encourages parents to begin by asking the child what level of competency and ability they want to achieve in that area on a scale of 1 to 10. One is that they want to learn enough to get by, 5 is average and 10 indicates that they hope to be a professional or expert someday. I thought this is a good way for parents to help understand the level of their children's interest and figure out how to best support them to that level. He gives the example of his daughter and piano lessons. As parents, they hoped her interest was at about a level 8 (interested in performing for others, etc.) . However, she was only interested in about a level 5 in that area and so she became proficient but did not really want to go any further.

I like this idea because sometimes I feel we tell kids that they need to be excellent at everything and that just isn't so. This helps kids understand that they can make choices about how they spend their time and helps them to consider what they want to achieve. It gives parents a way to gauge and support their child's interest and motivation in a subject. We can't all be good at everything, but if we think about it we can plan and prepare ourselves to be excellent in the things that are most important to us. As parents, it's our job to help our children figure out their interests and then help them to grow into those areas well. It's this type of parenting that is meant in the scripture "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6). I don't think this means only the spiritual or moral side of development, it also means helping our children discover the unique way God made them and how to use their gifts to the full potential.